it's been so long since i've accomplished much. I've let myself grow too soft... but now it's time for me to step up and live up to my heart. For Lisa, and our new son Kain, i'll keep fighting for our future. Our lives are starting to come together, thanks to the support of our families. Her sister has offered to take in our son like her own and care for him. As I type this, i am thankful for all the support we've recieved. This past 9 months has been a real trial for our faith and love for each other, but we've managed to pull through somehow. Here i sit in Lisa's room at Winnie Palmer Hospital, as she sleeps and we wait on our meals (which are really good here).

I Honestly thought i could change my life, and break away from everything, but as i've grown i've seen that i can't just live in that fantasy. When others are at the recieving end of my decisions, i cannot allow my selfishness to get in the way. but sometimes that same selfishness is what can help everyone. Kain, my son, could not grow up knowing how much i cared for him if i couldn't even be there to see him as he got older. I would have to run myself ragged to support him and Lisa, which i would do in a heartbeat. But when dealing with the lack of personal time i would get to spend with him, I cannot be with him OR Lisa as much as i should.

That's all for now... i think i'll be keeping this DA account and try to reconnect with my past life. I was a fool for trying to give you all up... and for that i am deeply sorry. Forgive me, my friends, and my Family.